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Dumber and Older

by Cataldo

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1.
Time is wasting away. All was quiet on the morning we met on a hot June day. Yeah, it won't last too long. It's a real cheap hit, if you blink you could miss it, a real cheap hit, it's gonna go by quick, then we're gone. (Then we're gone). If I'm James Dean you're "Easy Rider." If I'm "Led Zeppelin III" you're "Holy Diver." If you're Keanu in "Speed" I'm your Winona Ryder. Why hide from history if you're a lifer? You know I can't stand the waiting. But it's hardly the hardest part. I was born in the 80s. Too late for the good shit, too early to get over it. Too young to be dull, to old to be sharp like James Dean. But you're "Easy Rider." Barely "Led Zeppelin III" you're "Holy Diver." You're Keanu in "Speed," I'm your Winona Ryder. Why hide from history if you're a lifer? When I'm forgetting my place you are the reminder. Why hide from history if you're a lifer?
2.
Sitting where it was designed, trying to be obvious and wondering if you’re blind. Nursing a drink until my vision blurs while you check in with the regulars, just talking shit with you all night. Sussing out the vibe. And passing up on rides. If I could read your mind then I could catch my breath, I think I’d be just fine. You could die waiting for an omen, valentine. I don’t believe in a good moment at the wrong time. Put on “Feeling Strangely Fine.” The nights not over until the third attempt at “Closing Time.” You’re drying drinking glasses, ushering out drunk dumbasses. I cock my head, “Do you want to have one more?” You pull an ash tray out and lock the door. If I could read your mind then I could catch my breath, I think I’d be just fine. You think it’s just a little crush—hush. There’s no such thing as a good moment at the wrong time. I’m trying to catch my breath, but I’ve got nothing left waiting in my lungs. And If I’ve lost a step, then we’ll just try our best to keep the tempo up.
3.
Out of Reach 02:59
Here we go, it's a Monday. I'll carry on doing all of my Monday things. I'll do them all again in seven days, I've got big goals, but growing up isn't my scene. Ooo-ooo-ooo-oooooh so they're out of reach. At least that's what I think. Let's make a baby in a year or two. (Nature willing) when there's a little less on our plates. If I'm lucky it will be like you. Cuz if we stall 'til my hearts peaceful, god, that's gonna be a wait. Ain't it just like they told me? Ooo-ooo-ooo-oooooh but it's just out of reach. At least that's what I think. It's woefully dystopian, it's a leaky little boat we're in. And the channel is wide. I'll count your strokes, keeping track of it, before I really put my back in it: a mutually assured bummer vibe. And in the sad event we don't see the other side ooo-ooo-ooo-oooooh it was just out of reach. At least that's what I think.
4.
I'm not too sure if there's a god above, and if there is if he's someone we can trust. What if there is no shepherd, if there is no flock, just a bunch of dirty sheep trying to wait out the clock. That's not to say the cabernet's not divine But it's just ordinary wine. With no king of kings sitting on the throne we're just a couple billion people trying to make it alone. Bouncing numbers in the bingo hall waiting for the evil eye, or the old hand of fate to fall on your ball I'm hungry to live instead. But there's just ordinary bread. I hate to share the bad news but part of me always knew. Need something strong to unwind. So mercy me, I hope you don't mind, the least I can expect is one more sacrament. If you can smell it on my breath please don't be unkind. It's just ordinary wine.
5.
Chariot drivers let me know if you can just hang tight on swinging low. I'm not that worried about my soul but I can't just Irish out and go. It's just a matter of trust to let me love you. It's just a, it's just a matter of trust. Forgive me William, I don't know, I must have heard you on the radio. So sue me like you need the dough! You wouldn't do that to me Bill Joel... would ya? No. It's just a matter of trust to let me love you. It's just a, it's just a matter of trust. I'm trying to tell you the truth overhearing me on the other line. It's hard to sing you the blues when you're looking me square in the eye. But I'm never lying to you valentine. It's just a matter of trust to let me love you. It's just a, it's just a matter of trust.
6.
I'm thinking of you-- what kind of trouble you might get up to when I'm away for a week or more. And if I'm being honest the best case is you're just bored without a head on your shoulder. Somehow both dumber and older, the weather's getting colder now. Who doesn't need a vacation to see how to be a person? Please be patient while I'm learning how. It's beautiful here. But you wouldn't like the odds of seeing Mt. Rainier. But you can still snap some real good shots just hiking up the hill and hitting the coffee shop without a head on your shoulder. Somehow both dumber and older, the weather's getting colder now. Who doesn't need a vacation to see how to be a person? Please be patient while I'm learning how is every day getting shorter? No matter the season there'll always be a reason to stall. Might do some years as a loner. I'd rather be a little lonesome than kick rocks and be nothing at all without your head on my shoulder. Somehow both dumber and older, the weather's getting colder now. Who doesn't need a vacation to see how to be a person? Please be patient while I'm learning how.
7.
To the brim — Spilled my cup on the sidewalk, bad luck wherever I went. Trying to keep it level, to try and keep it on the level for ya. Moonstruck, ‘til the bolts cut on the garage, keys cold in your hand. Yeah we had some weather. There’s gonna be bad weather, with or without you. And you can’t hang on to everything, but you can’t hang on to nothing. You know I’ve tried. There’s room in the trunk and half of the backseat, so take what you need to drive. Drifting lanes on the fucking freeway, with way more weight than I planned. Trying to keep the wheels straight, to keep on the straight and narrow for ya. You’re a tough guy ‘til the wells dry, trying to haul up a bucket of sand. Praying for the rainy season, hoping for a sign, a reason. To go on without you. And you can’t hang on to everything, but you can’t hang on to nothing. You know I’ve tried. There’s room in the trunk and half of the backseat, so take what you need to drive. Just take what you need to drive.
8.
If my hour-to-hour is cowboy chords, before I’m home at night I guess my job’s the IV. Drinking myself blind, smoking myself dumb, straining to hear the V before the I. A swarm of little birds whip-cracking through the sky. Know how to keep the pace, know how to fall in line. There’s no emergency. There is no reason why, I just woke up one day too tired to fly. Kept it buried for a long time. You just met me, but you think you know me, right? Yeah, tightrope walker there’s a lot on the line. Kept it buried for a long, long time. Didn’t used to be this hard to avert my eyes from the heart of man, from the rising tide. Grasping through the dark, though I’m not trying much, to find that thin bare wire I’m scared to touch. Kept it buried for a long time. You just met me, but you think you know me, right? Yeah, tightrope walker there’s a lot on the line. Kept it buried for a long, long time. Oh good, I’ve got me phone, with algorithmic dogs and babies, naked ladies, shit, I’ve never felt more alone. So go on take it hard. Thumb through all the shots you blew, the friends you knew, be advertised to, go on and feel it all. Don’t keep it buried It’s been a long, long, time.
9.
You don’t really want to sing the blues. You’re not sad, but you know that you’ve got to blast it out while they’re pouring drinks. Give ‘em hell while they’re ordering chicken wings. Don’t sing so hard. You don’t really want to play guitar, but you’re taking requests and covering Big Star. Barely a glance from the chattering crowd, if you’re singing “Night Moves,” might as well sing it loud, loud, loud, loud. Don’t sing so hard. I keep it quiet when I’m driving home. Fuck the radio. Fuck an open road. Window down, wind crushing my ears, could be no one, nowhere, easier than myself here. Don’t sing so hard.
10.
There's a room I keep under lock and key, walking by it ten times a day at least. Absentmindedly touching the door knob expecting it to be cool or hot. But it's not. I can’t change, and lord I want to. Might seem strange, but it’s hard to go back to the start. It's hard to go back to the golden age now that we are so far apart. I’m waiting for curtain call from side stage while wishing I had one more shot. Today I drilled a peep hole, the racket raising every damn soul. Saw shapes that made it hard to breathe, things I know are there but try not to see: all the ugliness inside me. I can’t change, and lord I want to. Might seem strange, but it’s hard to go back to the start. It's hard to go back to the golden age now that we are so far apart. I’m waiting for curtain call from side stage while wishing I had one more shot. I can’t change, and I don’t want to. I just want to go back to the start. Might seem strange when moving on to just want to go back to the start. Maybe tonight I’ll set them free and let em get their yayas out on me. Roll my eyes at some while they give me grief, let others stare me down while I beg and plead , "Get back in there by morning please." I can’t change, and lord I want to. Might seem strange, but it’s hard to go back to the start.
11.
"If you’re feeling lost, I’m feeling most lost. Playing my part, trying to escape my chart-- the story that I tell myself to impart some meaning to this meaningless heart." "Jessie, let’s get real-- that’s how we all feel. Carrying the stone without wincing when we stub our toes. But at least I’ve got you here to compare notes And chit chat ‘bout the things we used to know" Walking the same ground, bothered by the same sound: A whisper under breath saying nothing’s for or not for the best except trying to let each other suffer less. Sorry if I’m preaching, and boring you to death.

about

In January 2020 Andy Park and I went out for a drink to talk about making what would become “Dumber and Older” the record that is officially out in the world today.

We had used every studio in town making “Keepers” and went to San Francisco together for the John Vanderslice Experience (TM) on "Literally Main Street" and we were both yearning for a slightly more casual approach. We talked about experimenting with mostly recording at home, and then began bouncing ideas back and forth over dropbox.

That would soon become the only way anyone could make a record. The pandemic hit and I got laid off from my job. It was a harsh toke. But I had this little record to get me through.

It ended up being surprisingly collaborative, given the circumstance. Every musician I knew was home with nothing to do. If they didn’t have a home recording set up in March they had one by May. We collected little bits and bobs from our remote friends, spent 3 days recording some drums and bass at Studio X that summer, and would occasionally rope someone in to pop by and sing or play something. Andy moved into a new place and built a studio somewhere in there haha. It’s all kind of a blur, trite but true.

I knew I was making a really good record, maybe even an especially special record, and that was an exciting feeling. But the process itself is what got me through the strum and drang of the past few years. It showed up as what I needed each day: a purpose. A distraction. A connection to other people. A connection to myself. A reason to be joyful.

So today I am feeling grateful for the experience of making it, grateful to the many folks who let me borrow their spirit and sensibility for a few minutes on each song, grateful to everyone who helped me get it out into the world, and of course grateful to those who are listening. I really think it turned out pretty good. Onward!

-Eric Anderson 10/14/2022

credits

released October 14, 2022

Produced, Engineered and Mixed by Andy D. Park
Additional Engineering - Sam Rosson and Trevor Spencer
Mastered by Emily Lazar with Chris Allgood
Released digitally by Westbrook Modern House
Distributed by The Orchard

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Cataldo Seattle, Washington

Cataldo has been hailed as “the rare kind of artist who’s able to absorb the chaotic world around him and distill it into crystalline song” by American Songwriter. Keepers has been welcomed as “nostalgic, and effortlessly, poetically profound,” by Nylon and “wistful and hopeful and beautiful, a brightly emotive yet understated slow-build." by Stereogum. ... more

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